The Razzie Goes To...

With the awards season over, we can only wait with baited breath to see how many razzies Paris Hilton's latest masterpiece will garner next year.

The Hottie and the Nottie follows Nate Cooper (Joel David Moore, Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story) on his quest for ‘Hottie’ Cristabel Abbott (Paris Hilton), his 1st grade crush and lifelong obsession.

Tracking her down in LA, Nate discovers Cristabel has taken a vow of chastity until the ‘Nottie’, her aesthetically challenged best friend, June Phigg (Christine Lakin, Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical), finds someone special.

As Nate sets about matchmaking June and wooing Cristabel, he soon finds his feelings torn between the Hottie and the Nottie.

This film is undoubtedly intended to expand the ever growing Paris Hilton empire. As Executive Producer, Hilton has manoeuvred her way into her biggest role to date.

Undeniably, she looks better here than ever before and she does her best to earn her ‘Hottie’ status.

First time director, Tom Putnam, checks all the boxes:

Running shot? Check.
Dancing shot? Check.
Yoga shot? Check.
Bikini shot? Check.
Lingerie shot? Check.

Almost all slow motion close-ups of course.

But no amount of posing can disguise the fact that Hilton cannot act.

Her insincere and derisory effort fails to convince us that this is anyone other than Paris Hilton, celebutante extraordinaire.
Any attempt by Joel David Moore and Christine Lakin to invigorate their everyman and ugly duckling characters is entirely overshadowed by Hilton’s presence.

There is a distinct lack of chemistry between Moore, Lakin and Hilton and the largely unknown and unremarkable cast are mere footnotes to Hilton’s self-indulgence. The cast are not helped by first time screenwriter, Heidi Ferrer’s awful screenplay, which contains script so laughably bad that it could almost be ironic.

That said, the first ten minutes are pleasantly surprising, as we see young Nate’s efforts with Cristabel and June in 1st grade and then watch adult Nate get smashed over the head with a guitar in a flash of brilliance by his soon to be ex-girlfriend.

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